seriously going nuts, fighting with time. 6PM, writing done? NO! 2 1/2 hours have gone by, while I am struggling with my timeline, going through boards and notes, and I can't find my notes on something I need and will have to re-look it up. AND this something needs to happen before I think it can.
nasty nasty mood, carrying on, and Cheese brings in piece after piece of Halloween candy asking me to check its wrapper, then minutes later brings it back and asks me to look at the candy, then shoves it in my face, and makes me smell It ( I keep telling him this isn't wise unless he intends for me to eat it). Half the time, he then decides he doesn't even want that piece, "wrong flavor", "it looks funny". I just, basically yelled, "Why do you keep doing this, you can tell I am all hostile, when you hear a roaring tiger, see it clawing away at the air, why oh why would you come in and try and pet it! It's gonna bite you!". He just laughed and said "So you think this Hershey bar smells okay to eat?". "YYYYYEEEESSSSS!!!!".
Okay hippity hoppity off I go to google.
7:11 PM-Child is now very clearly tormenting me for his own amusement. Pulling tiger's tail and making funny sounds.
For story- I'll have to skip over stuff I can't figure out, and write other parts, stressing out, losing mind.
I am done. My sanity came back to me as soon as I stopped worrying and started typing. (And when Cheese started watching a special Spongebob mini-movie at 8 o'clock). I am surprised that I didn't end up skipping over any parts. I think once I fall apart and tell myself I can skip what I can't work out, then I just go on ahead and end up doing those parts as I go along. I reached my goal of the day. I now have 14,135 words. Honestly at 7pm I didn't think there was any way I was going to make it.
I will still have some timing issues to work out on later parts. But I know what I am doing tomorrow, so there should be no stress fest. Goodness but I was really coming unraveled.
My problem, basically the garden is like another character in the story and making sure of the timing of plantings and blooming, and coordinating it with the day to day activites of main character, and needing those things to have relevance and be in order with some flash back stuff, is what is pushing me round the bend.
so now it is 10:34, I am tired, it is time to go to bed, and I can go to bed since I am done (done with the wash too), but I am not feeling peaceful. I am not fully unwound from the tight ball of knots I managed to work myself in to. And I think I better make sure I have a back-up copy of the writing, it may not be good, but at leat it is something, and if I lose my only copy of this something, well....best not to even imagine that.