Saturday, April 7, 2007

In memory

-So tomorrow is Easter. We always used to go to my aunt's house, but they moved at the end of August, so we wont this year, which would have been sad anyway, but since her daughter (my cousin) died in December, it is so much worse. So I am thinking of that part of the family and thinking of my cousin. Her Birthday is in April so we would add that celebration onto Easter; it is her 15th birthday. So, I am typing in my memory tribute, that I had on the funeral home site, I waited till just before the last day it was up, because I wanted to say just what I needed to say, and worried that I would sound, I don't know, too sentimental; but my Husband said there is no such thing, as too sentimental when it comes to tributes to loved ones who have died.
I'm going to change her full name here, to A.

Jan. 8, 2007

A memory tribute to A.

Hi A,
I miss you! I'm sitting here printing out all your tributes (you are so loved), and as I look out the window above my desk, it is rainy and grey and all the flowers are gone. I miss their happy beautiful faces, but I know they will return in the spring (like a gift and a promise from God, though things appear gone from us, they go on and continue in other ways, and eventually we will see them again). How I wish you could return in the spring with the flowers. Spring is my favorite season, and Easter my favorite holiday, and we always spent it at your house (easter egg hunt, good food, chocolate). I will miss you most every year, when the flowers return, and you are not among them. But I believe you, little flower, kind and beautiful still grow and bloom, just somewhere where we can't see you right now, this I must believe, for it is all my heart can bear. And someday I hope to grow and bloom near you, there will be sunflowers for you, and pink peonies for me, and our souls will walk together in fields of flowers, and we like them, will bloom and grow forever, no partings, no pain, no sorrow (the end of a winter all our hearts must endure till then). Till then know, that thoughts of you will continue to bloom and grow in my heart (that is where I have planted my memories of you). And from now on, whenever I see a sunflower's sweet joyful face, I will think of you, A, and maybe if sometimes for a moment, in that moment, you would see a sunflower and think of me too, then maybe our souls can still touch.

Goodbye for now,
Love you always,

-I can't believe I wont see her tomorrow. I wonder who will be the first one to cry? I think it will be our grandmother. My mom will try hard with the happy till then; but I don't imagine anyone will cry alone.

While I was reading her tributes, the song Edelweiss, from The Sound of Music, kept playing in my head. That is why you have the bloom and grow, in my tribute. Bloom and grow, in the snow, Bloom and grow, forever, edelweiss, edelweiss....

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