Friday, May 16, 2008


the rain hums on
mixing with the sound of the fish tank
and the fan upstairs
Bob sleeps on and on

* update, just got back from the kitchen, the perpetual dripping sound is not the fish tank filter, but water coming down the chimney and landing in the bucket I placed in the fireplace.
(kind of the opposite of a warming fire)

I have a doctors appointment for Tuesday, now that I have finally made one, I can't wait to go. I can't wait to set my mind at ease and not waste any more time and energy concerned that this or that might be "something". I really think this has been stealing my focus lately (since mid-Feb.), even out in the garden where I am usually really happy and free, these thoughts and concerns come in and steal my energy. I worry when I dig holes, and haul dirt, that I will strain something, and then my chest will ache more, and then it will be harder to sleep at night, because it will make me uneasy. It is a drag and I am tired of dragging these concerns around, so I intend to drop them off Tuesday afternoon, and come home without them.


Absolute Vanilla (& Atyllah) said...

Very good idea to go to the doctor when something that's troubling starts to nag and gnaw at your mind like that. Best to know what you're dealing with and get it sorted. Hope the visit goes smoothly and well and that you're 110% okay!

By the way, I've tagged you for a meme over at my place :-)

Taffiny said...


I'm thinking of it more as setting right my psychological well being. 110% okay, sounds 110%fantastic. Thanks for the well wishing. I do get so nervous in such situtuations. On the one hand I want the check-up to be thorough so my mind will thoroughly be set at ease, on the other I do really poorly (freak-out) with giving blood, and other unpleasant testing.

Oh a game of tag, I'll come right over. :)

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