a meme about various things

sent my way via Vanilla

1. What were you doing 10 years ago?

1998. My son was on the verge of turning 2. We had just gotten back from California, where Bob was considering moving to and going to art school. Bob decided to come back (to New Jersey, at that time). He STILL considers moving to CA on a regular basis. I think of 1998 as the last year of my childhood, by November my pop (grand-pop), who we were living with, had a heart attack, a bad flu that winter took us all down, and 1999 was the year of care-giving and saying goodbye. My Pop died in July and my Nana in February of 2000. 1999 was the hardest year of my life, thus 1998 is known to me as the time before, when I was still young, and those I loved would live forever. I miss that girl.

2. 5 things on your to-do list for today-

general stand-by list
clean/cook
exercise
write
garden
shower
(I scarcely ever do them all, but I try to make sure I attend to at least one of them each day)

things I tend to find I do often without their ever being on a list
eating, watching prime time TV, researching on net including real research/goofing off/and itunes, there also seem to be many things that I am uncertain what they are but I must be doing them (something) for they seem to take up time. Also running erands (grocery, library, gardening centers)

trying to parent in a positive way, and enjoying my child. These aren't really on the list, they aren't set activites, and would never be "done" and thus crossed off. But they are part of my life agenda, or process, or..whatever

I end each day with gratitude that I got to be here and have this day, and hope that I get another chance with another day
tomorrow

3. What would you do if you were a billionaire?

honestly.....I would find the spot of my heart, it's home echo on land, I would look out at green hills, and blue waves of water, and I would make my nest, planting flowers all around. I would paint, and read, I would garden and write, and I would stare at the sea and dream. I wouldn't stress about how much this jar of pasta sauce costs, or if I have bought too many David Austin roses. I would spend days watching birds twitter, and sea turtles swim. I would create myths to inhabit the water foutnains and ponds on my property.

honestly...I would pay someone to clean my house once a week, and perhaps have a part time cook. I would wear canvas sneakers, and faded blue jeans, with pale girly tops most days, and breezy light summer dresses the rest of the time with pink flip flops impersonating sandals. With an ever present sweater jacket to layer over or toss on a chair or in the grass.

I would like to have some money set up in a way to keep making more money to give to causes. I would like to make some garden libraries, books, plants, fish, birds. Like a little oasis found in unexpected places, in different parts of the country. (eccentric perhaps, that is what is good about being a billionaire, freedom to be eccentric).
I would like to do something with hospitals, probably with plants, and fish, and paint. Especially for the kids, but for the others as well. And set up some programs.

I would also do some things to help out family and friends, like help pay off their homes, et. cetera.
Bob worries so much about money, and I stress him out so, with my goceries, books, and plants, it would be so wonderful to have him be free of that, free to choose his own creative pursuits. I would love to be able to offer that to him.



4. What are three of your bad habits?

fear,
indicisiveness (wanting to make the right decision, or best decision whether it is which flavor of ice cream to have in a cone, which rose to buy,or something bigger like where to live), (wanting to know the end result of each decision before I make it, so I can choose)
procrastination,

also, I tend to do it (wahtever it may be, cooking, cleaning, garding, painting, shopping) not at all, or over-do it.
I've either made nothing for dinner or made three things. I either bought no shorts or I came home with five pairs.
I tend to shop in this odd sort of way, where I buy nothing for long streches, then buy quite a bit but keep it in its bag with tag, and then little by little take things back to the store, and perhaps buy one other item, and perhaps take that back later as well, I keep some of what I buy, but a small percentage. This does not hold true for plants, books, or food though, where I keep what I buy. And I can be pretty darn lusty with groceries, plants, and books, It feels like there are long stretches without much good, or with books and plants without any, and then suddenly I am ravenous, and buy lots of books, and lately my plant purchases have felt like a criminal addiction, no big deal if we had plenty of extra money, but there are plenty of other things that money could do toward. But...but, I love the flowers.

also a sort of laziness, a tendency to weigh out the pay-off of any exertion to the benefit of said activity.
I like puttering about, being idle, not motionless in mind and body, but slow and dreamy, swimming in a sense of expansive time.
I am indeed capable of working long and hard at something that strikes my passion, like digging hole after hole, after hole, running around comparing plants, and prices, and then buying, and planting, hauling around wheel barrows full of heavy dirt dug from the treeline, but even on this I will burn out soon.

5. What are some snacks you enjoy?
Snacks?
When you say snacks, I think carrot sticks, and carrot orange juice over lots of ice, I also think watermelon. I really enjoy these. But I try not to snack, because snacking makes me hungry, and results in my eating a meal. I love fruit, but I don't usually snack on it, I eat it for breakfast.
Salty snacks, like pretzels, popcorn, potato chips, nuts, just make me hungry, so I never eat them as snacks. Either as part of meals or desserts.

Desserts!
Desserts are a bit of a problem for me, and I am trying to stop thinking I should have dessert every day (mostly because my sugar glucose was 107, instead of under 100 like it should be. And then there is my weight). Oh I like all sorts of desserts, could go on and on...

So I don't snack, I EAT, but I am trying, really trying, to train myself to eat more often and eat small meals. And also to not give so many calories to dessert. Between the fruit for breakfast, and then the dessert, I think I am getting too much sugar.


6. What were the last five books you read?
I don't know,
I know I read Potter, the Deathly Hollows. ( I should say J.K. Rowling, not potter's)
I read The Secret Garden

since then I am hip deep in the half read
Eat, Pray, Love
memoirs of a geisha
$64 dollar tomato
Gone with the wind
A Little Princess
White Ghost Girls
I capture the castle
some of eckhart tolle's a new earth
Parts of many food/eating books, like In Defense of Food, et. cetera.
And started re-reading Jane Eyre.
I think there was some other book, this past year, that I did read all the way through but I can't remember what it was.
Plus lots or internet and book research for story and for my garden.
I tried to listen to Lolita on tape but couldn't stomach it, almost decked a man at grocery store for moving around too close to my child. Did listen to The Shop Girl on tape.
Oh sh*t I do recall something I did read all the way through The Bridge to Terrabithia. The swearing is because it was sad.

7. What are five jobs you have had?
Washed dishes (in grandmother's restaurant). Also did food prep.
Work study porgram at college, worked with security guard one year, another gave school tours, other two did clerical stuff for offices.
Retail, Macy's sales girl.
Wife/homemaker
Mom

8. What are five places where you have lived?
Bethlehem, Pa
Philadelphia, Pa
Washington, NJ
Upper Macungie, Pa
and my current Pa residence.
(San Diego was once almost in my grasp, but like water slipped through my fingers)

What five people do you want to tag?
Vesper, chick with a quill
Paul, struggling writer
Amy, Med Views
Moon, though I doubt he will do it
Witnessing, assuming he is around.